Tuesday, October 04, 2005

About Janine

I haven't posted in a bit. Thought I would start writing as often as I could. So I'm hoping that the blog thing will help me. I've always said that I wanted to keep a journal. So... here's something I jotted down the other day about someone I love dearly. Thanks Janine!

There is woman I know and love dearly who helped me get through a very difficult part of my life. She lost her mother when she was a teenager and became like a surrogate mother to me when I was in my teens. Maybe that's why we were thrown in each other's path of life, so that a somewhat lost kid had someone to look up to and aspire to be like. Whatever the reason I won't argue with it because she has been one of the most influencial people in my life. Her three children are lucky to have a mother with such grace, honesty and love. I moved around constantly when I was younger and I am very glad that she wasn't one of those people that got lost in the mix between towns or schools. How do you effectively thank someone that has helped you in such enormous ways.

I was living with her and her family when she had her third child. He's a teenager now, I remember him sleeping on my chest for hours at a time. I was hanging around and babysitting her first two children when they were 2 and 3. It makes me feel old when I realize that they have graduated high school and both drive now. Whenever I am around them I feel young but can't believe how much time has past. There was a time that felt closer to those kids than I did my own sisters. After I moved out on my own there were times when we would see each other constantly and times that months would go by without a visit. They are family so it was never an issue between us when one of our lives got so busy that certain periods of time had more contact than others.

When I think about what part of my life I'd like to go back to, the time where I felt the safest, the time I felt the most happy, I think of my time spent living with them in their home or in the basement suite of their house. Even now when I have feelings about how my life has turned out, there are aspects that I would love to have now that I had when I was a part of their daily lives.

Janine and I don't agree on everything but we never really argue about things. I will have to admit that she is usually right about things in regard to my decisions, whether they be relationship based, financial or otherwise. Considering that she has three children, has lived a bit longer than me and knows me very well I probably shouldn't be surprised when she is right almost every time.

I aspire to be as strong as she has been in her life. I hope I have morals as high as hers. She's fair and honest. She is wise. She is connected to her children and has provided for them emotionally in a way that I have never seen anyone do and I hope I can do the same for my children.


At 5:21 PM, Blogger adminsupervisor said...

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Keep up the good work, I'll be back to visit. Adrian


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